How to cope with guilt?

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How to cope with guilt?

Post by kadoka on Sat Jan 25, 2014 4:18 am

I cannot say much, in last days I spend hours on Internet writing in so many online forums, waiting for a right response, waiting for something that will make me feel better...
My pekingese dog, my little Asya died 7 days ago, she was 16 years old, blind and deaf, and with arthritis problems, sometimes she took pain medicine but we were able to settle everything, I was completely devoted to making her last years as comfortable as possible: I cooked for her, gave her massages, carried her everywhere, looked after her like she was my baby, I slept with her and held her in my arms every night to make her feel safe.... and had her in my mind all the time... and 7 days ago, I was out, and when I came home I found her smothered with tv and lamp cables, I dont know how she did that, she somehow embroiled herself in this cables and in panic she must have rotate over and over, and I was not there to save her.... I am so horrified and anguished thinking about her last minutes, I cannot get this out of my mind and am eating myself with so much guilt I cannot breath...
I am not very good in english, and I cannot write anymore, I cry all the time... there is nothing left to say.... maybe we must believe what others say ..... that we gave our dogs everything and when its time to go nothing can stop it.... maybe the time passing will make things better.... I just cannot believe this right now.... as much people tell me its not my fault, I feel more and more smitten by guilt...

kadoka

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Re: How to cope with guilt?

Post by kurtaaron on Sat Feb 01, 2014 6:11 am

I am so sorry to hear about your pekingese dying while you were out. I can't imagine the pain you are experiencing. I don't claim to have the right words to tell you. All I can say is you are not alone in your sorrow. It's hard to understand when things go so wrong in this world when we try our best to love our pets with all out heart. Please hang in there and know your beloved Asya is now at peace and holds nothing against you. You loved her through her entire life and did all you could for her. This was an accident that was not your fault.

It has been almost 3 months since I put my cat Tristan to sleep and I still feel some guilt because I could have waited longer but there were just too many things going wrong in his life. I miss him so bad I still cry. I live alone and my apartment is so empty without him. It's soo sad it's like a part of us dies when they do. But they will always be a part of us and we have to push through and try and focus on all the love and joy they brought us. My heart goes out to you. Please remember the good times and all the things you did with her and try and let go of that tragic moment that she died.

God bless you,

Kurt

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